Allison Main (left) making breakfast with a friend for her small group

Real Faith
An Honest Look at My First 365 Days of Being a Christian

by Alison Main, as told to Marlene Baer

"I think I'm ready."

This was the text message I sent my youth leader, Kelly, who just happened to be on jury duty. Kelly had been meeting with me weekly to read through the book of Mark, answering my endless questions about what it meant to follow Christ. I was on the fence, but thought now was the time.

Her phone under the jury box, Kelly sneakily texted me back some scripture to look up.

"Cool," I wrote back. "Can you send me more?"

We went back and forth like that with me asking more questions, and Kelly responding. Probably the first time she's ever led someone to Christ with a text message!

Now came the hard part -- telling my family.

Faith at Home
Growing up in a home where there was no family religion, it was hard to express to my parents how I actually became a Christian. I knew when I became a Christian I would be going against everything my family believed -- not just my mom, dad and sister, but my extended family as well. This really scared me and kept me quiet for a long time.

I decided I should tell my dad first, simply because I knew he would be more accepting of the concept. The first words that came out of his mouth were simply, "How in the world are you going to tell your mother?" When I approached my mom, things were not as easy. She called me "unfair," and for a long time thought I was brainwashed because I had become a Christian so fast. She would restrict me from going to church by taking my car keys or distracting me with other tasks during youth group activities -- all in hopes of bringing me further away from God.

Although my mom has not accepted my new faith, both she and my dad have seen how committed I've been to youth group, small group and church. They've come to realize this was a life decision for me. The relationship I have with God isn't going to simply disappear. This decision was and always will be my own.

Even though they've realized this, it continues to be difficult to share my faith at home. A lot of the time I feel as if my parents are not interested in my faith or what I have to say about being a Christian -- and that is beyond hard. It often feels like there's a huge hole in our relationship because I have accepted Christ and they haven't.

But even still, there have been opportunities to share my faith.

Since my mom has been diagnosed with cancer four different times, the after-life has become a huge topic with my family. One of those opportunities to share came when my mom was recovering in the hospital. I couldn't believe it but she sincerely started asking me simple questions about how small group and church were going. Afterwards, I really felt like she wanted to know about my faith and it made me feel a little more relaxed about sharing.

Although walking through these rounds of cancer with my mom has honestly been the hardest and most stretching time of my life, I believe God gives us those experiences to express what we feel and to go beneath the surface to the deep meanings of life and faith.

Faith and Friends
Becoming a Christian also drastically changed my friendships -- especially since the majority of my 16 years of life had been spent hanging around non-Christians. They weren't necessarily interested in what had happened to me but were more interested in what was wrong since that change. They didn't like the idea that I no longer joined them in the party scene, and they could see that my language and sense of humor had changed along with it.

To have something so life-altering happen to me while their lives stayed the same, created a huge gap in our friendships. During my junior year I felt trapped between my new Christian friends and my non-Christian friends. I struggled with reaching out because I didn't think they would understand why I had changed. And for a long time, because of that struggle and lack of communication, many of those friendships fell through and I ended up losing a lot of my non-Christian friends, which I really regret.

Looking back, I wish I would have simply reached out and expressed my faith more. But at that time, I felt like those old friendships were shallow and fake, and it was often easier to just avoid those friendships altogether.

Opportunities did come up to share my faith with these friends, and I'm realizing now that I didn't take many chances to use them. A huge part of being a teenager is the need to be accepted and to be part of the "in crowd." Being a Christian is hard because it comes with so many stereotypes. A lot of people assume that I'm closed minded and judgmental which is hard for me because I believe I am none of those things. I wish I would have not cared so much and really jumped into those opportunities to reach out to these friends.

Even though I can be hard on myself for missing opportunities with my non-Christian friends, I've seen God work ... which brings me to Nick. Because of our last names, we ended up sitting next to each other in health class during my senior year. He was a freshman, which could be partly why I was less intimidated to share my faith. In the beginning, we had what I would call a shallow friendship. Our conversations were mainly small talk.

I came to health class one Wednesday after our weekly youth group breakfast, and told him how full I was from eating. And that led to talking about church in general. I told him my story, and he was in awe of what had happened. When I told him about the amazing youth group and church that brought me in and really inspired me to become a Christian, Nick opened up and told me how his church had recently fallen apart and that he was looking for a new church to join. Of course I invited him to Wednesday morning breakfasts and soon conversation was endless. I would pick Nick up before breakfast and we would discuss how we were doing in our faith over the past week and truly what we were struggling with as Christians. After breakfast on our way to school, Nick and I would discuss what we thought of the speaker, and how it related to our lives. The biggest thing I learned from this experience is the importance of sharing and reaching out to someone. Sharing those spiritual conversations with him was definitely an amazing feeling.

One of the hardest things about my first 365 days of being a Christian was seeing my closest friend, Chessie, walk away from her faith. Chessie was one of the people who encouraged me to accept Christ and she represented what it was like to be a Christian in a way I had never seen before. What I loved about our friendship was our ability to be open with each other about our relationships with God. It was painful to watch her start to doubt her faith and fall away, especially being a new believer myself. She doubted God right to my face, and asked all the hard questions like, "If there were such a God, why would He give your mom cancer?" or "If God is so great then why are there people suffering all over the world?" or "Why would God put me through this time of non- believing and doubt when all I want to do is believe He is real?" One of the biggest challenges in sharing my faith with her is to fight the feeling of wanting to force her back. Instead, I continually reach out to her, listen to her doubts and hard questions. This has taught me the importance of accountability and being around people who have the same love for God. Those are the people who will encourage you in your faith and remind you that you have something deeper to hold onto.

Faith at Work
There have been other times during my first year as a Christian where God has totally surprised me by surrounding me with other believers. It was on my last day of work at a floral shop, when the designer Gigi and I had our first spiritual conversation. We had become good friends over the past four months even though there was an age difference of about 30 years. Like before, youth group breakfast became the starting point for our first spiritual conversation. We were shocked when we both realized we were both Christians. That experience taught me a vital lesson: no matter what age or where you are, God is all around and He works in our lives in so many different ways and through so many different people. God has a plan for us to meet and interact with everyone and to spread our faith.

Often, the fear of not being accepted, feeling judged and letting people down holds me back from sharing my faith. But the mere fact of holding back your faith and not being willing to share is what causes Christian stereotypes. I've found that people are always willing to listen and be listened to. I believe that the biggest step we can take as Christians is to find those people and love them as much as we love our Christian friends. Take it from me -- don't be afraid to be yourself and be honest when you discuss your faith with others. People are looking for honesty. Being honest with God and friends, family and coworkers is what has gotten me through everything.

More Spiritual Life . . .